FBC Glenpool Women’s Ministry
Women Worshiping with God’s Heartbeat in Committed Obedient Ministry
Devotion
10-1-09
Not Mine But Yours
Matthew 26:39
“And He went a little beyond them, and fell on His face and prayed, saying, "My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; yet not as I will, but as You will."
Over and over again Joyce tossed in her bed, hot than cold, blanket on than off, on her back and on her belly and nothing seemed to work. Finally after tossing the entire night she decided to get up. “Oh, I might as well just get up and start getting ready for church. Man, I have tossed all night and didn’t get much sleep. I sure hope I don’t fall asleep in church.” She walked into the bathroom, turned on the light to see her watch and to her surprise it was only 1:30 in the morning. “What! I can’t believe it, I feel like I’ve been tossing all night and it’s only 1:30, I am never going to get any sleep.” Joyce said with tears in her eyes. It had been almost six months since she had slept all night. Between the hot flashes and the insomnia her emotions were on edge and her body felt whipped. She crawled back into the bed, laid back on her pillow with her hands under her head and tried to relax, but the more she thought about not being able to sleep the more she stayed awake. It was a never ending cycle.
As the clocked ticked Joyce prayed and asked the Lord to please help her get some sleep. “Please Father; take this insomnia away from me. I am so tired and I have to teach Sunday school in the morning. I have no energy and my patience is on edge. Please Father, help me.” She closed her eyes and before she knew it she had drifted into a soft sleep, but only for an hour and a half. Nevertheless, she was happy to get that much. Finally it was close enough to time to get up and prepare for her day. She went to church, taught her class, and fixed a nice lunch after church and than prepared for the Bible study class that would be in her home that night.
As the women arrived Joyce could feel the heaviness of her eyes and her breathing seemed shallow. She shared with the women about her situation and a couple of them could understand because they had been through it themselves. They prayed for her after the Bible study and then headed home. Joyce shared with her husband how the women had been understanding and prayed for her. He tried to understand but it just wasn’t something he had ever dealt with as a man. Later that night as Joyce knelt beside her bed she recalled what the Lord had prayed for in the garden. He had asked the Father to remove the cup of suffering from Him but then made sure the Father knew He even more desired to be in His will. She thought about His suffering and realized that no matter what, even if she had to suffer with insomnia for the rest of her life, His
grace would sustain her through it because His will would be done. Then she prayed.
“Father, I have asked you to take away my insomnia so many times but tonight I do not. Tonight Father I want to tell You that even if I have to have this the rest of my life I am going to use it for something good. For now on when I wake up I am going to use that time to study Your word and to get to know You better. It will be quiet and it will be our special time together. I want to thank You Father for this time in my life and for what You will do in me because of it.
In Jesus name Amen”.
Joyce than got up off her knees and went right into her office where she opened her Bible and got it ready to study when she woke in the middle of the night. She then slipped into her bed with a smile on her face and peace in her mind as she looked forward now to waking up.
The next thing Joyce knew she heard the alarm ringing. Jumping up to turn it off she stopped, stunned in disbelief because there she stood in the morning light. For the first time in six months she had slept all night; and for every night after that as well. The insomnia was gone!
Joyce realized that God had heard her prayer, changed her situation, and gave her rest.
She was so happy for the sleep but sad for not getting the time she had looked forward to spending with the Father. “I guess all You wanted from me was a willing heart to take the negative things in life and to use them for Your glory. Thank You Father for allowing me rest, unlike Your Son in the garden when He said, ‘Not mine but Your will be done”. So let this be my prayer every day as well, Father. Not mine but your will be done... In Jesus name Amen.”
What about you, how are you doing today? Are you struggling with something that is just wearing you out? Well go to the Father, praise Him and thank and He will give you peace.
“Thank You Father for Your peace. Thank You for the trials. Thank You for making me more like You. In Jesus name Amen.
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